Beast Mode

Spirit Week from the “satirical” perspective of the senior class.


Mike Rohlfing

The senior class on Class Color Day.

It’s the last first day of the best week of our lives. The time for talking is over. And war, WAR, is upon us.

Upon arrival at the parking lot, we are perplexed to see a mass of pink. Tailgate parties are strictly reserved for the seniors, as written in Section 15 of the Spirit Week Constitution. Still, we saunter into our side of the junior/senior commons, gathering to jam out to some bops from Riley Merrifield’s night-club-degree speaker. Right before the bell of first period sounds, however, a throng of juniors gather in their allotted side of the commons, and begin to chant and sway in a huddle. We look around for our revered Blue Crew leader Henry Hartshorn, or just a football player, to rile us up, but no one takes the lead. The bell rings, and we are insanely fired up to beat their dis- play of spirit during the assembly.

When the time has finally come to assemble in the Arena, we jostle and jeer, jump and jive as a united sea of blue. In tag royale and chariot relay, we reign victorious.

Day Two has come, and a fine sea of country hicks and club chicks fills the commons. Unfortunately, the juniors pull the same stunt as Monday, and we can only stare at them.

Once we enter the arena, we ARE Wildcat Country. The games begin, and we win women’s tug of war, junk relay, and math-letes VS athletes. Though we lose to the sophomores in men’s tug of war, we recover by yelling TP chants at the juniors.

Day Three has begun, and once again we have been upstaged by the juniors in the commons before school. Morale is looking grim as our pride is attacked once again. This is our house, but we aren’t acting like it. Time to take it to the court.

Upon entrance to the gym, we mock the TP incident with police siren audio and fake cops “catching” TPers. Somehow, we don’t get in trouble. Soon enough, it’s time for Film Project, and surprisingly, our film looks like it may be in contention for a place besides last. Excitement emanates through the air, and until the end of the rally, we ride high on it. When it ends, though, we are brought back down to earth by the unfortunate state of our Art Board. With the help of what seems like an army, the job gets done in a few hours. This, unlike the suggestions given at recent lectures, was a true show of unity.

Day Four is here, and we’re lookin’ cute. For the fourth day in a row, though, the juniors pull up in the commons with some #sway, yet we stand around aimlessly. Shameful. In the arena, we finish victorious in women’s tug of war and ultimate chick- en, and put on a surprisingly presentable Film Project. Things are looking up for us.

Now… for the final day. We show up in chilly excitement to the parking lot for a tailgate, where girls are in a flurry of picture-taking and boys are jumping on a truck bed. Our party is busted, though, when Mr. Pederson beckons us into the school. Little does he know, however, that a good chunk of us will be attending the rager of the century later tonight (the writer of this story will not be, but that’s irrelevant).

At 2:10, we swarm the arena. The Lip Sync performances of the grades below us proceed, and we’re pleasantly surprised at the talent of the freshman routine. The junior routine restores our confidence, however, that we will win, if not at least beat the juniors… or will it? When the announcements of the top two of each event are named, we find ourselves neck-and-neck with the juniors in Boys’ Poms and Lip Sync.

After the assembly ceases, the event with the most anticipation has arrived: the Big Night. In the bleachers, we rally for senior players like Brennan Orf, Zach Benes, Bennie Anderson, and Matthew George. As the second half of the game begins, the girls and guys in the big events scurry out to make their costume changes. The game buzzer sounds, and just as the basketball Cats were victorious over JBS, so shall we also beat the juniors.

Several solid performances later, we crowd the gym floor to hear the results. The initial news of winning Boys’ Poms comes as a bit of a shock, but is welcomed nonetheless. But then… panic hits. The Lip Sync winner is crowned on those undeserving surfer and biker heads of the juniors. Literal tears are shed. Fortunately, our announcement as the overall winner dries up the tear ducts, and even more so, the announcement of the juniors falling in third place behind the sophomores. **cringe**.

And so concludes Spirit Week 2020. Though many shenanigans ensued afterwards, and the group chat will eventually be revered as a historic document, the seniors delivered big this week. Hopefully, that energy will be kept up for the remaining three months of high school (lol).